I Remember When…


Yes, when I was very young -7? 8? Something like that…I seriously pondered, just who is it that is looking out through these eyes from inside my head? Who, what – I knew then that it wasn’t a “brain” that was looking out through the portals on my face into the reality around me…so what then is it? The unanswerable question at the time, besides – as our beloved John Lennon said: “life is what happens when you are busy (pondering) other things” – right? So life was happening to me, around me, with me or without me for a very long time until a time when owning my life – knowing that this is my life – no one else’s – was part of the equation. This deduction took a few years, of course – LOL.

Life is what happens…we wish we were older, how come I am different than others, puberty, opposite sex, feelings of inadequacy…good enough or not, lack of confidence, what do I love to do, first love, first kiss, school – plus all of the adventures along the way of growing up that give us glimpses into the depths – hopefully – of our imaginations, passions, heart pumping exhilarating moments…if and when we dare. Oh yes, those are the adventures, the soul deep thrills that give us glimpses into the other realities – know it or not – that were also happening. Life – the Journey of Realization through experience – the experiences that helped to ‘wake us up’ to the endless pursuit for an understanding of “Who Am I, why am I here, and Where is here?” …and so much more.

When you think back to that moment of wondering about ‘who is this inside of me’, I don’t think that once you ponder that it ever really goes away. It might not be up front and center, but it is always there. As we step through the myriad of BS piles everywhere along the way of growing up – experiencing all the things – somewhere in these experiences or the culmination of them something happens that triggers a person and leads one to ask not just ‘who’, but ‘why?’ Now we are off to the chalk board for sure. But is this the actual moment that our awakening commences? When did or does this start? Is there an official moment that one can use to say that it started? Does it matter?

Reflecting back to a ‘when’, a time frame of an event…well, this almost seems like a meritless pursuit – like, why? For Pete’s sake. Who is Pete anyway – would he be one of Pete and repete-? Timelines are quickly disappearing, right before our eyes and feet, physically and ethereally as we watch what “was” disappear from this reality we are collectively experiencing. All these experiences, Pete and Repete major players in the dramas of life, can be tapped for what they offered us along the way, as tools in these incredible transformational and awakening times. With awareness – this is what we know to do now…identify the ‘Pete and re-pete’ parts, i.e. programming and conditioning, so that we can start sloughing them off to then REALLY get to know WHO Am I.

I am a perpetual student and always will be. These kinds of things simply as curiosities are great to ponder – this has become my life completely. I do believe that in this pondering one can begin to put a personal life process into some kind of understanding. A. A. Milne comes to mind as the creator of Pooh and his forest family for his son Christopher Robin Milne, and ultimately for the great percentage of children worldwide – with some good ole fashioned wisdom that doesn’t hurt anybody, especially not a bear or a piglet.

Understanding…sometimes the simplest things can help allow the greatest understanding of yourself, and what’s around you.

This encourages me to say this: for an update and to make some kind of sense out of this jumble of thoughts in words, it has been a while since I sat down to write for a blog. A few years ago I was living in the jungle of Costa Rica and my favorite thing – or one of them anyway – was to awaken in the wee hours when the silence (hahaha) of the jungle was so loud and inspiring in it’s wildness that I could step into the zone of a beautiful flow of words to share, thoughts and feelings about things of the jungle, the night…and other. Much has happened since those days and it is very hard to find a place to start now as I begin yet another Journey right here and now, with so much to jabber about and just say, hey hey.  I shall step into this very new 2022 adventure and strive to avoid too many piles of nonsensical kinds as I find that zone again…sin la jungle. I want to talk story about what is going on, through an ever curious and very Me need to know. There seems to be a very rapidly shifting relevance to so much data downloads we are getting, that I will pursue what seems to be stimulating, fascinating and maybe just fun. Somewhere in there perhaps there is a point to share that is worth sharing – . And because of my devotion and passion for astrology, some of that will be in here as well. I have collected many tools in my experiences and now is the time to put them into action: creating.

I jump into this project with great heart, adding my unique something to this birthing of a new reality. It has been called numerous names with many references, we can even talk about that. Life is a Journey, and there is absolutely no reason EVER why we don’t have the Divine Right to explore it – as one of a race of New Humans becoming the Caretakers of Mother Earth – gives it a whole new look, right?

Bear with me, pun and all – and in this we can strive to find some fun and wisdom to laugh about during these incredibly transformational times that seem to offer much to ponder, right?

Until next…


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